tellmiurmeaningoflife

MUDANE

Recieved an email this afternoon saying that our resume has been sent and that we should expect news from casino within 60 days.
2 months leh ..
Am i suppose to carry on this life for another 2 months?

Anyway...
Should be going cruise with bao,his mama, pig, bao cousin this April 2-4
Should be going to Berkelah with SPRovers from April 10-12
But it seems like not much people are free to go with me leh =(
i wanna go outdoor. Relieve stress jump into the water over n over again.
i called fred he say go school
Call JY he say not confirm
Call weekiat he say he got school.
Super lost form.
No choice we grew up and are on their paths to better life le.

I wanna go pulau hantu desperatly.
I wanna go there swing on hammock.
I wanna go there to enjoy the cooking session.
i wanna go there to play risk.

Brought my grandma to doc today.
Apparantly her urine is still infected but the condition are much better.
Just continue taking the medicine for another 4 days. things should be just fine =D

Recently friends around me like so filled with trouble.
I try as much to help.
But i think im rather uesless in the issues also.
Just hope my prescence will aid in some way or another.

Just heard a sweet story from my friend regarding his successful wooing of a girl.
Now he is happily attached again =D
Feel happy for him.
But i was thinking..
Why i can live for a year plus without anyone falling for me ah.
Something must be wrong somewhere right.
Too Fat?
Too Ugly?
Too Manly?
Just tell me the truth!

posted by five4fighting @ 2:23 AM 0 Comments

I M TIRED

I AM TIRED
BUT
I CANT SLEEP
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT MY CAREER
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT WAT I WAN IN LIFE
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT SLIMMING DOWN
I CANT STOP THINKING WHETHER MELVYN IS DOING FINE
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HOW LONG MY AHMA WILL BE WITH ME
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT DRIVING MY OWN CAR
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU

So much said.
But im still at ground zero.
No accomplishments.

Yes. i maybe always cracking jokes and smiling away.
Maybe trying to help those people around me if its within my means.
I maybe a listening ear giving my piece of advise hoping it will help the situation.
But...
No one will be able to lift me up from here.
At ground zero u jus battle with yourself.

One word for those whom dun wish to waste their time on me.

USELESS

posted by five4fighting @ 3:04 AM 0 Comments

Tired

Lets see...
Another weekend has passed and this it how it went for me.
Sat Balled at cckcc followed by chill at a tanjong pagar pub.
After tat was la kopi at 302. Till early morning get breakfast for ah ma.
SLEEP

Sunday wake up in the afternoon feeling so lertagic...
Balled at cckcc.
Continue to ytcc becoz i m too lousy to play full court with those guys =.-'
Super breathless.
Let me sleep and wake up with my 21 km run stamina pls!
Homed.
Was watching tv and surfing net.
Till this friend of mine text me.. telling me he is tispy and stuff.
Ask me go take care of him.
I feel so stuck eh.
Like i care as a friend but...
aiyo.. anyway i went eggs sending with bao super tired now.
Sleep for like 3 hrs the most.
was about to take a nap.
think again i better not sleep le. i think i cannot make it to ytcc if i manage to doze off...

Take care people

posted by five4fighting @ 5:58 PM 0 Comments

i'm a qualified driver!

Yea!
Finally passed my class 3 liescence this evening =D
The wait before the test was so grueling.
U listen to people getting reprimanded for their mistakes
U see people walking off with a satisfied smile
U see people leaving with tears.
Anyway... called bao pig shijie aunt n mother upon passing to tell them the news
the feeling only got a word to describe
SHOIK!
Balled at cckcc after tat.
Anisia injured her kneecap again =/
Told her to eat more build up muscle to support her joints liao.
U see la! diet some more la.
better rest this time.
No kidding.

But anyway ah ma is still not feeling well at all.
She needs to be check on constantly.
She really letting us take care of her.
This is something she never did.
Always she will insist on herself.
I think this time really serious ba.
Medication she also rely on us waking her and feeding her with it.
=/
Just recover pls.

Tomorrow got no plans at all yet.
Still deciding if im going o bar.
But i kinda drink till scared leh
If my handsomes dun turn up also boring leh.
wahahaha
I'll join venture with marie for the flower shop.
eat together 3 meals flowers.
SHIT
I miss him so so much =(

posted by five4fighting @ 4:24 AM 0 Comments

ah ma is sick =(

ah ma was running fever since last night...
Really bad.
A week ago she started to be unable to control her bladder really well.
She looked really weak and painful.
This morning i check her out.
She hasnt eaten anything.
And she is constantly going to the toilet.
Pulled myself up pass her a piece of bread and a glass of hot honey water.
She just obeyed wat i ask her to do
After that passed her 2 panadol..
She jus ate and sleeped...
see her like that i really scared to lose her.
Brought her to see doc at ubi.
Doc say she got urinal infection.
Den suddenly blood pressure drop low also.

Brought her to eat something.
She no appetite. So just ordered a fishball soup for her.
At least i see her eat i feel better.
cab homed.
Now me and aunt constantly checking on her.
Her body temperature is either too cold or too hot.
She puked her dinner out..
She puke her medicine out.
Now we kinda helpless ..

Heart totally get squash to see her like that.
This lady here used to piggy back mi to see doctor..
She used chase after mi with a cane.
i cannot lose her and cant bear to see her suffering like this either.

Tomorrow TP.
But i rather give all my luck and blessing to ah ma.
Actually deep down.
We know one day she has to go.
Just not able to accept.
Ti gong pls por pi ah ma ping ping an an

posted by five4fighting @ 1:19 AM 0 Comments

MAHJONG DAY

Mahjonged whole day today.
Fun as usual.
But smoked alot alot..
=(

Coupier job is now opened to public liao.
Lots of job opening up for casino at marina sands le.
Jia you my friends.
We'll be colleague there and build our career from there.
Correct?
BAO FEI SHIJIE MARIE!
Cant imagine all of us working there.
The feeling should be great.
Just hope that bao n fei buck up on their studies.
Dun so slack.
Will regret de.
BIG MONEY!

I wanna drive desperatly.
Pls grant me my liescence.

posted by five4fighting @ 4:06 AM 0 Comments

I was awoken by my phone ringtone to realise i gotta wake up to accompany bao for eggs sending.
Was a normal day sending eggs
Till one stop he suddenly open the door and say ... siao liao debbie egg fall liao u go see..
From the side of the lorry i see the egg yolk n whites dripping..
WEEUWEE
Sexy dao...
in the end i gotta help him pick up unharmed eggs
Thankfully only about 100 casualties from amoong the almost thousand eggs which met this unfortunate disaster.

Anyway .. headed to IMM for his phone again.
So lucky of him eh . Can get a $150 voucher for his phone.
Nvm la. at least i get a free 1gb mirco sd.
Free de~ wahaha he dun need ma. so gimme lo.
homed.
Ate curry fish head & black pepper crab & mai pian sotong.
SHOIK.
Met jason for a drink at my void deck.
Drink a bit onli he gonna concuss le.
Tomorrow he gotta outfield somemore.
apparantly he 5 30 gotta wake up.
Next week going taiwan again.
He take planes like taking buses.

To all my friends...esp.shihui.marie.anisia.shijie.ahsoon.ahbao.
Hope u all de relationship happy happy find happiness.
JIA YOU DA JIA!
*WOOSH*

posted by five4fighting @ 1:14 AM 0 Comments

Vday

V day at o bar was great.
We actually planned for jus me and marie to go.
Ended up got quite afew to join us too.
There that night was Roger,yunxiang & gf, pig, shijie, prasad.
Oh ya. we saw xihong there as well. as usual he say i gain weight liao. wat a comment man.
But he still as cute as ever. haha
Anyway that marie say she will die die stay at o bar, which she fail la. Run up run down. once o bar always o bar ...
Saw Jason there as well... thanks for the drink ya. I bet u had fun that night.
Pioneer guys where there as well. Saw kelvin & gf ah bang and the pioneer HEI BAO!
Jun ren came to look for me as well.. Thanks for the drink too.
Oh ya.. weicheng and gang was there too. weiming kevin ahbird yizi
Puke quite a bit when i got home.
That stupid junren wanted to bluff me back to o bar to go boat quay with his friends..
CRAZY.
Tell me that marie is dead drunk kick her she jus lie on the ground.
Wat a lie to come up with to make my U turn from highway lo.
Lucky i not that drunk to believe him yet.
Yesterday was so so crowded can!
Gave up going toilet afew times.
Dont talk bout smoke break so reluctant to squeeze out jus to smoke.

Woke up for driving lessons this afternoon.
Am glad to know that my driving haven all throw back to instructor.
After driving headed to cckcc for ball...
Play quite a bit today.
Full court killed me.
Lucky can sub regularly with anisia.

Feel kinda unconfortable the whole day kept coughing n feel kinda nausea,
No appetite to eat at all eh .
Look at my yee mee and feel so full when i haven eat anything at all for the day.

WEIRD.

Good night my friends ..

posted by five4fighting @ 2:06 AM 0 Comments

Mel will be heading back to sydney this evening le.

Will be a year later that i will see him ba.

Hope things dont change too much.

This time i already feel the change le.

I dont know about the next time.

I knoe im nobody to him anymore..

Nobody.

Anyway.
Take good care of urself alright.
May tian gong look after u and keep u safe.
May kong zi por pi ur studies pass like a breeze!
Be safe.

posted by five4fighting @ 2:43 AM 0 Comments

This week is almost coming to an end.

Lets see...

Monday.
Accompanied bao to send eggs.
Eat crab with aunt.
Balled.

Tuesday.
met ggxl+p
for nonya buffet.
went to blue jazz to chill.
Wonderful and affortable place.
Will be there soon..
Felt so directionless that night.
Everyone having plans.
Financial plans. family plans. career plans.
All i know is i wanna get into casino to work.
I wanna make it big.
But if u think again.
Why must we plan when man plan god disposes?
if u slog for 10 years. saving the cash in the bank.
den u get into a accident.
U will ask urself.
Why i work so hard for.
u cant bring those Zeros in ur bank statement with u.
U plan to stay healthy.
dun smoke dun drink.
doesnt mean u will ling long n healthy
even if u do... living long doesnt mean its a good thing.
U see ur loved ones go before u ..
Ur friends go before u.


Wed was a fruuitful day.
Went to work in the evening for a event...
HEading home changed.
DBL O.
First time i can club in DBL O.
But i mus agree that o bar music is still better
But their air condition cannot make it totally.
Sua to boat quay..
Home at 5 30 am.
Slept...
Dreamt...
Heart achey when awake from the dream.
Lagi pain when i check my phone no message nor call at all..
headed to ytcc for ball..

Tomorrow gotta acc bao for egg sending again.
den go imm to shop for his phone.
den dunno go where liao
Considering o bar.
But kinda reluctant.
Save it for sat i guess.

Moral low nowadays.
Dunno why sia

posted by five4fighting @ 2:22 AM 0 Comments

i miss u still.

really.

posted by five4fighting @ 2:51 AM 0 Comments

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELVYN!

Sent out a Birthday Sms greeting jus few minutes after 12 midnighit.
Kinda dampen my mood when i recieved the reply.
So cold... So not moved at all.

Anyway. HAPPY 24th BIRTHDAY MELVYN.
Next week u'll be back in Aussie le.
Take good care of urself..
I know u can tahan cold weather but jus wear a jacket ba.
Its better den catching a cold right.

So i met up with mel,jy,fred,rebb
went to k for 2 hours.
Very cheap i should say.
each person is 10 dollar exactly.
Free flow drinks.
Still got this bowl of shark fin's soup.
altought we all knoe its obviously shark fin lookalike jelly.

They were craving for MJ.
So came to my placed and MJ-ed jus for a round.
Melvyn as he is the shuo xin gong today. was extremely lucky ...
Good thing i still managed to win a little =D
Felt damn bad when bao JY eh ... =/

Online now and he told me to stay strong.
To stay strong jus bearing 2 weeks before things change to a simpler mode
OR
To stay strong without his special attention.
I hope its the first one really.
Shant think so much.
Jus hope there will be chances to meet up again.

I got watch TV le.
Enjoyed today's simple and nice gathering.
Something sad its like i feel a slight gap with them this time.
I dun knoe how to explain.
jus a bit outta place.
Weird.
I never had that feeling with them b4.

posted by five4fighting @ 1:22 AM 0 Comments

emolution

Back home after balled.
Today went to Raffles place in some stupid casino uniformn to give out flyers.
This stupid CHAI SHEN YE of us reprimanded me for giving out a BLOODY 50CENTS GOLDEN COIN CHOCOLATE!
He was like saying blah blah blah u knoe how much this choco cost ma.. iTS 50 CENTS LEH .
Nearly take a 50 CENTS and throw at his face.
He lucky he wearing cai shen costume.
I still wanna mj win money wan .
IF NOT HIS FACE WILL FULL OF 50 CENTS!
wat the hell..
Fking chee hong ti ko chai shen wanna be.
Good thing it rain n we slack on corner...

Was back home 5 min. den was deployed to lam soon cc for bball..
Played full court i like DOG panting..
Better go jogging soon or else i will pant while chasing buses soon le.

Bao and pig came to meet me for dinner.
So sweet of them la..
they jus pop by lam soon cc ask mi go.
Like father bring kids home like dat.
Haha

During dinner i got deployed again.
This time to Terlok Blangah ...
As the precious little one is runninig a temperature.
I gotta be nanny cum nurse to take care of him tomolo.
How nice ...
Going to head to terlok blangah now...

Tomorrow got a k-ster date with GGXL & rebb.
YEA.. like FINALLY!

He has been running thru my mind...
Over and over again.
Logged on. Saw him online.
I knoe this nick will appear offline in 5 mins.
I guessed it right.
Perhaps he is afraid i cant resist and chat with him ba.
How saddening.

Sat gotta go back school to deal in mock casino.
For the fun of it ba.
Polish skills a bit.
Maybe the Marina Sands casino VP will sot dao wo den i ho seh liao!
I need to shop desperatly.
my shoe all gonna visit their ancestors soon liao...

V day i got a date!.
Go club with marie.
at least not so lonesome.
Tomorrow i die die must buy toto.
got ling gan...
hahah
TIO LIAO wahahahahahahaaaaaaa
sorry ah ... got the gambling and drinking genes from my father smoking genes from my mother
=P

Here i go.
Call me NAI MA!

posted by five4fighting @ 10:49 PM 0 Comments

hair

hmmm.. sorry im so bored. thats why im back here again.



i kinda like this hairstyle i had last time.



wats ur idea of it?



but for me to get into that hair again..

i'll be boi boi again.

need some courage eh

comments?

posted by five4fighting @ 6:42 PM 0 Comments

i wonder

posted by five4fighting @ 6:38 PM 0 Comments